I missed your debut at The Clinton House last week, but luckily for me (and the FuneralRain audience) Portland’s own TheMetalNetwork captured the magic on their videomotron, so I was able to catch it second hand. Fucking sweet set guys!
Thanks man! You know we be keepin’ it true.
I heard that those pansies in Spellcaster were at your house show too… how brutal was the beating you gave ’em?
Spellcaster is just another gaggle of Hot Topic posers that we have yet to crush from existence.
Why only 40oz.? I happen to know that any one of you consumes more than 40oz. of malt liquor in his sleep! Also, I seemed to notice a bit of a theme with your songs… do you think it’s possible to get audio alcohol poisoning?
Very possible, in fact when we hit the studio, every track will be recorded using our massive dicks after a good jerk sesh with some high proof liquor.
Do you guys have any plans beyond getting bombed, rocking the house,vomiting on your equipment and giving random chicks e coli through an Alaskan Pipeline? Demo? Contract? Worldwide inebriation? Or is this project one of those wait and see sort of deals?
While yes, being the hottest band since the Bee Gee’s and being fucked up 24/7 in our gold mansions is gloriously better than anyone else’s lives (not to mention the endless wave of supermodel ramming) it comes with a price. After you consume a certain amount of drugs and alcohol, your cognitive ability to make plans really just goes out the window. As is the case with us.
Can you guys out party Cross-Examination? I whole heartedly believe that a co-headlining house party of this caliber needs to happen. You guys could meet halfway in Nevada or something.
Funny you mention that, because we actually have partied with Cross Examination. While yes, they put up a good fight, 300 beers later The 40 O-Z’s reigned victorious. It’s really just a testament to the fact that if you try hard and believe in yourself, you really can do anything!
From what I can tell from the info on your website, you guys are concerned about the lack of protein that young women today are consuming (both orally and topically). Such a noble cause. I salute you!
Ah yes, we’ve spent much of our lives fighting the good fight. Sadly with over three and a half billion malnourished women on this planet, time is not on our side. Many of these girls will never have the privilege of slurping down our trouser pudding. That’s why we invented hair metal so many years ago, it made a real impact.
Is there anything you’d like to add for the Funeral Rain audience?
Yes, in a world of posers and pussys we are the light of hope. We are here to make people realize, by looking at us in all our glory, how much better their lives could really be. So next time your boss pisses you off, don’t take that shit. Slam a 40 of steel reserve and fuck his wife.
Next time your late for class & your teacher yells at you, don’t take that shit. Huff some spray paint, sharpen your pencil and shove it up his butt. Drown in the warm sudsy embrace of the 40 O-Z’s
Together, we are the future.
The 40 o-z’s. On Facebook