Funeral Rain Press Corps

Genres: Action, Monster Movie, Sci-Fi
Studio: The Global Asylum, Echo Bridge Home Entertainment

Oh Jesus Christ. I bought this DVD at Wal-Mart for $5. So already I knew the quality. The fact that it’s an epic battle between a… well… mega shark and a giant octopus… let’s just say I knew it was going to be crap, but probably a fun watch anyway.
Boy was I mostly wrong.
First up, if you’re going to use CGI to do a fair amount of the action for you (shark coming towards naval ship for example), don’t use the SAME DAMN SHOT three or more times. Or when your shark and octopus are fighting.
There were other instances as well. Stock footage is weak. It’s even weaker when used multiple times.
Second, if you’re going to write a movie and fill it with nobodies, at least make sure they can act. These people cannot. And, along with this, make sure the plot is believable. For the most part, this movie is not bad in that regard, but the ‘love story’ is complete shit. People don’t know each other for a day or so and then fall madly in love to have sex on a navy ship. Just doesn’t happen.
Finally, continuity errors are crappy, especially when they are brutally blatant. If you remove those, chances are you’re on your way to a brighter future as a filmmaker.
And include some kind of special features on the DVD! A “Making Of…” or “An Interview With…” or even a drunken commentary track.
Unfortunately for me, however, there is also a sequel. Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus, which naturally I now have to hunt down and buy, simply because it stars Jaleel “Steve Urkel” White and Robert “The Doctor” Picardo, and looks to be a better movie in general.
Check the trailers for both flicks below.
4 out of 10.

Genre: Grindcore
Label: Relapse Records

Starting off with a couple shots of pre-show beginnings and a sample from an old anti-drug film, FTF’s Disgorge Mexico the DVD is a live show, the entire album Disgorge Mexico in all it’s glory, plus the song “The Pile of Flesh You Carry”, as well as a film by director David Hall, which is nice and slightly twisted.
The show itself is filmed by a couple cameras, showing different angles to the insane proceedings. Effect-laden post-production gives the entire proceedings a bit of a dirty look, an old film stock look, which really works well with not only the songs of Disgorge Mexico but also the sound of Fuck The Facts in general.
The high point of this DVD is the fact that not only do you get to see FTF fucking up a small club, but a really cool film with Disgorge Mexico as it’s soundtrack too.
The low point of it is the same for all live show DVDs: it makes you wish you were there, and it’s always kind of depressing to watch a killer show and wish you were there.
Despite that, this is such a killer fucking view and a killer fucking listen.
9 out of 10.

Fuck The Facts on MySpace .

Genre: Death Metal
Label: Bode Preto Records/Independent

Death metal on DVD. This is just cool. This thing shows up in my mailbox, and at first I thought it was a CD in a DVD case, which I like. But taking a quick look at it and it’s actually a DVD, I got excited. Threw it in, and let it rip.
Apparently Verminoso is Soturnus Skillcrusher’s 2009 demo, and for a demo it’s great. Two shows, one twenty minutes long, the other ten, and some really good songs are presented in a high quality fashion.
If you’re into really good death metal with solid riffs, check these guys out. And if you’re into seeing shows without being at the actual show, grab a copy of Verminoso. It’s really good.
7 out of 10.

Soturnus Skullcrusher on MySpace.